Episode 49: A Mother's Guide to Thriving

Mom playing with daughter in back yard

Intro: 

Welcome to the "Wellness in Every Season" podcast, where we embark on a transformative journey towards achieving total wellness, even in the midst of overwhelming moments. I'm your host, Autumn Carter, and I'm thrilled to have you here.

This podcast is a sanctuary for all mothers out there, and we extend a warm invitation to anyone seeking guidance and inspiration. We believe in fostering an inclusive community where we learn and grow together, supporting each other during life's challenging transitions.

Join us as we step out of survival mode and discover the path to thriving, embracing wellness in every season of motherhood. From sleepless nights to new beginnings, we'll explore practical strategies, share heartfelt stories, and uncover the transformative power of self-care and self-love.

Together, we'll unlock the wisdom, strength, and resilience within ourselves, reminding one another that we're never alone on this beautiful, yet demanding, journey. It's time to prioritize your well-being and reclaim your joy, one season at a time.

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EPISODE INTRO

Welcome to Episode 49 of "Wellness in Every Season," Finding Balance Amidst Chaos: A Mother's Guide to Thriving," we delve into the complex, often challenging world of motherhood, addressing some of the most pressing pain points that moms face in their daily lives. We understand that being a mom isn't just a role; it's a journey filled with love, chaos, unexpected challenges, and profound rewards. This episode promises to offer insights, strategies, and reflections that resonate deeply with every mother striving to find her balance.

We will explore the art of mindfulness and its transformative power in managing the whirlwind of motherhood. Recognizing that each day can be a balancing act between personal aspirations, family needs, and the unexpected curveballs life throws our way, we'll provide practical tips on how to stay flexible and adaptable.

Are you feeling overwhelmed by the endless to-do lists and responsibilities? Do you find yourself yearning for a moment of peace amidst the noise and demands of parenting? We hear you. In this episode, we will delve into understanding your natural energy rhythms and how to align your daily tasks with these patterns, maximizing your efficiency and reducing stress.

But it's not just about managing tasks. We'll also touch on the emotional aspect of motherhood, addressing feelings of guilt, inadequacy, and the relentless pursuit of perfection that many moms grapple with. Through thoughtful coaching questions, we aim to guide you in a journey of self-discovery, helping you to redefine your priorities, set achievable goals, and embrace the beautiful, often chaotic reality of motherhood.

Our conversation promises to be more than just a discussion; it's a space for learning, growth, and connection. So, whether you're a new mom trying to navigate this new world, a seasoned parent facing new challenges, or anywhere in between, this episode is for you. Join us as we journey together in "Finding Balance Amidst Chaos: A Mother's Guide to Thriving," and take a step towards embracing the joy, love, and fulfillment that comes with being a mom.

Key point #1: 

In a vibrant suburb, the story of Jordan, a mother of three energetic children, unfolds. Alongside her part-time job, she navigated the busy waters of parenting and personal aspirations. However, the continuous rush of responsibilities began to cloud her sense of self, her laughter growing scarce, her dreams receding into the shadows of her demanding life.

One evening, in the quiet aftermath of a bustling day, Jordan found solace by her kitchen window, her reflection a portrait of introspection and yearning. It was in this moment of vulnerability that she recognized the need for change. This pivotal realization led her to Autumn, a life coach celebrated for her personalized approach to helping mothers like Jordan.

Autumn's philosophy was not of rigidity or universal solutions. Instead, she offered a tailored coaching experience, uniquely attuned to Jordan's individual life and challenges. Her guidance centered around embracing life's fluidity and seeking harmony within it. Through mindfulness, Autumn showed Jordan how to find joy and peace in everyday moments, from the hush of early morning to the carefree laughter of her children.

Recognizing the necessity of self-care and personal growth, especially for someone balancing a part-time career and motherhood, Autumn encouraged Jordan to rediscover her passions. She reminded Jordan to cherish the present, to celebrate the love of motherhood, and to recognize the preciousness of the life she had built.

Under Autumn's bespoke coaching, Jordan's transformation was profound. She adeptly balanced her work and parenting responsibilities, her laughter returning as a melody in her home. Inspired, Jordan began a blog, sharing her journey and resonating deeply with other mothers.

A year after meeting Autumn, Jordan stood at her kitchen window, now a reflection of revitalization and purpose. Her blog had grown into a supportive community, and she had successfully launched a small business, channeling her passion into a tangible venture. Her children, basking in the light of their mother's renewed energy, thrived more connected and joyful than ever.

Significantly, Jordan's transformation had a ripple effect on her significant other. Witnessing her journey, he became more involved in family life, finding a balance that allowed him to grow in his own career while supporting Jordan's endeavors. His increased participation in daily family activities and responsibilities created a deeper bond within the family, fostering a nurturing and supportive environment for everyone.

Jordan's journey with Autumn showed that going with the flow was about embracing life's unpredictability and finding beauty in its imperfections, especially when guided by coaching attuned to one's personal needs. Jordan learned the art of living in the moment, celebrating her achievements, and navigating the fulfilling, yet demanding path of being a part-time working mother. Her story stood as a beacon of transformation, showcasing the power of individualized mindfulness and the resilience of the human spirit in the face of life's complexities.

Key point #2: 

As we transition from Jordan's inspiring story to what this journey could look like for moms tuning into the podcast, let's imagine the myriad of possibilities that await when embracing a similar path of transformation and mindfulness.

For the mothers listening, each of you is on a unique journey, filled with its own challenges and triumphs. Like Jordan, you might find yourselves juggling multiple roles - as a parent, possibly a career woman, and an individual with personal aspirations and dreams. The first step in this journey, as exemplified by Jordan, is acknowledging the need for change - recognizing that amidst the chaos of daily routines, your own well-being and dreams are of paramount importance.

Imagine starting this transformative journey with the help of a life coach like Autumn, someone who understands the unique challenges of motherhood and can offer tailored guidance. This coach would work with you to identify your individual needs, aspirations, and challenges. The coaching process is a personal one, focusing on what you specifically need to find balance, joy, and fulfillment in your daily life.

Through this coaching, you might discover the power of mindfulness, learning to find beauty and peace in the small moments - the quiet morning coffee, the laughter of your children, or the satisfaction of a task well done at work. This mindfulness practice can help you stay anchored in the present, reducing stress and increasing your enjoyment of daily life.

As you embrace this journey, consider the ripple effect it could have on your family. Just as Jordan's transformation led to her significant other becoming more involved and growing in his career, your own growth could inspire positive changes in your family dynamics. A more balanced, fulfilled you can lead to a more harmonious home, where each member feels encouraged to pursue their own growth and happiness.

A year from now, you could be looking back at a journey of remarkable transformation. Perhaps you'll find yourself more engaged in your parenting, more fulfilled in your career, or even embarking on new ventures that were once mere dreams. Your relationships with your family might be stronger, and your understanding of yourself deeper.

This journey is not just about changing routines; it's about reshaping your life to align with your values and dreams. It's about finding joy in the journey of motherhood and life itself. As we continue this podcast series, we'll explore more stories like Jordan's, delve deeper into the practices of mindfulness and self-care, and provide you with the tools and inspiration to embark on your own journey of transformation. Remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, and this could be your first step towards a more fulfilled, balanced, and joyful life. 

Next is our mindfulness practice and when we come back we will talk about affirmations and what to do when feeling stuck while trying to change negative thoughts.

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Segment: Mindfulness Practice: 

Finding a quiet, comfortable space is the first step in this mindfulness practice. Sit in a comfortable position, either on a chair or on the floor, with your hands resting gently in your lap. Close your eyes and begin with deep breathing. Inhale slowly through your nose, feeling your chest and belly rise, and exhale gently through your mouth. As you exhale, let go of any tension you might be holding.

Shift your attention to your body, noticing any areas of tension. Consciously relax these areas, starting from your toes and moving up to the crown of your head. With each breath, feel yourself becoming more relaxed and present.

Now, start visualizing what a peaceful life looks like for you. Imagine waking up feeling rested and calm, moving through your day with a sense of balance, handling parenting, work, and personal time with grace and ease. Picture your home as a haven of peace, filled with laughter and love.

As you hold this vision in your mind, begin to repeat affirmations to yourself. These can be silent or out loud, whatever feels most comfortable for you. Affirmations like "I am a loving and patient mother," "I embrace each day with strength and grace," "I deserve time for myself and my well-being," "My happiness is a precious gift to my family," "I am capable of balancing my personal needs with my family's," and "I am worthy of peace and joy in my life" can be powerful reminders of your strength and value as a mother.

Allow yourself to fully embrace this vision and the feelings it evokes. Let the peace and balance you envision seep into your current state of being, and notice the calm and empowerment these affirmations bring. If you are feeling resistance, notice it but don’t judge it. Instead focus on the possibilities that come with these affirmations.

When you're ready, gradually bring your awareness back to the present moment. Take a few more deep breaths, feeling grounded and centered. Gently open your eyes, carrying this sense of peace and the affirmations with you throughout your day. Whenever you feel overwhelmed, remind yourself of this vision and repeat the affirmations to recenter your focus.

This practice is a tool you can use anytime to remind yourself of your strength and value as a mother, helping you manifest a life of balance and peace. Remember, every small step you take on this journey is significant and contributes to your well-being and that of your family.

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Key point #3: 

When engaging in mindfulness practice and repeating affirmations, experiencing some tension is normal, particularly if the affirmations seem at odds with your current feelings or beliefs. This tension can arise from self-doubt or internal conflicts. Here's how you can address it using principles of positive intelligence:

Firstly, acknowledge the tension without judgment. Recognize it as a natural response. You might think to yourself, "I am noticing some resistance or discomfort as I say these affirmations," which is a way of acknowledging your feelings as they are.

Approach this tension with curiosity rather than criticism. Gently ask yourself, "Why might this affirmation be causing discomfort?" Often, tension arises because an affirmation challenges deeply ingrained beliefs or fears. Understanding the root of your discomfort can be enlightening.

Try to shift your perspective. If an affirmation like "I am a loving and patient mother" brings up tension because you remember times when you were not patient, reframe it to something like, "Every day, I am growing in patience and love." This might feel more congruent with your experience.

Engage in positive self-talk to counteract negative thoughts. If you think, "I can't balance my personal needs with my family's," counter it with, "Balancing needs is challenging, but I am learning and improving every day."

If the tension feels overwhelming, return your focus to your breathing. Concentrate on slow, deep breaths to help calm your mind and reduce stress, bringing you back to a state of mindfulness.

Remember that acceptance of affirmations can be a gradual process. Repeating them regularly can help to shift your mindset over time. These positive statements can start to feel more natural and true as you continue to practice them.

Look for small moments in your day that reinforce the affirmations. For instance, if your affirmation is about being a loving mother, notice those times when you show love and care. This real-life evidence can help reinforce the affirmations and reduce tension.

Conclude your practice with a moment of gratitude. Think of things you are grateful for, regardless of how small. Gratitude can shift your focus from tension and negativity to positivity and abundance.

By acknowledging and working through the tension with curiosity, positive self-talk, and gratitude, you enhance the effectiveness of your mindfulness practice. This approach, rooted in positive intelligence, helps foster a more compassionate and accepting relationship with yourself, gradually aligning your inner beliefs with the positive affirmations you aspire to embody.

Next up, we will be talking about how to create a mindfulness practice on all the things in your life that you wanted and now have.

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This isn't your typical coaching program; it's a collective journey toward soulful, meaningful living. From day one, you'll dive deep, not just into your daily to-dos, but into your dreams, your desires, and the very essence of what makes you 'you.' We'll explore everything from color-coded time-blocking worksheets to meal planning with recipes that bring more than just food to the table—they bring joy. 

We'll guide you through decluttering your spaces, both physical and emotional, creating room for new growth. And let's not forget self-care; we'll delve into what that truly looks like for you, making it an unshakable pillar of your daily life. All of this unfolds in a nurturing community of like-minded moms, each on her own path to transformation.

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Key point #4: 

Creating mindfulness practices around appreciating what you always wanted and now have is a powerful way to cultivate gratitude and contentment in your life. This practice involves a conscious acknowledgment and celebration of the dreams and desires that have come to fruition, often things we may take for granted in the hustle of daily life. Coupled with journaling at the conclusion of the practice, it can deepen your awareness and appreciation of these fulfilled desires and help you connect more deeply with your sense of personal fulfillment.

Mindfulness Practice for Appreciation:

Identifying What You Have: Start by identifying what you always wanted and now have. These can be tangible achievements like a home, a family, a job, or intangible aspects like peace, love, or stability. Take a moment to reflect on these desires that have become your reality.

Setting the Scene: Find a quiet, comfortable space where you can sit undisturbed. This could be a favorite chair by a window, a cozy corner of your room, or any place where you feel at peace. Sit comfortably and take a few deep, calming breaths.

Mindful Reflection: Close your eyes and bring to mind these aspects of your life that were once desires and are now part of your reality. Visualize each aspect vividly. For example, if it's your family, picture their faces, recall moments of laughter and love, and feel the warmth of those memories.

Embracing Gratitude: As you reflect on each aspect, allow yourself to feel gratitude. Notice any sensations in your body as you embrace this feeling - a warmth in your chest, a smile on your face, or a sense of lightness. Acknowledge how these fulfilled desires have impacted and enriched your life.

Deepening with Affirmations: You may want to incorporate affirmations that reinforce this gratitude and appreciation. Phrases like "I am deeply grateful for my family" or "I cherish the peace and stability in my life" can be powerful.

Concluding with Journaling: After your mindfulness session, open your eyes and transition to journaling. Write about the experience, noting down what you visualized, the feelings of gratitude that arose, and any insights you gained. This act of writing helps cement these feelings and thoughts, making them more tangible and real.

The Power of Journaling:

- Enhances Reflection: Journaling after your mindfulness practice offers a chance to reflect deeply on your experience. It allows you to process your emotions and thoughts more thoroughly.

- Tracks Progress: Regularly journaling about your mindfulness practices can help you track your emotional and mental progress over time. You can look back and see how your perspective and feelings have evolved.

- Encourages Consistency: The act of journaling can motivate you to maintain a regular mindfulness practice, as it becomes a cherished part of your routine.

- Promotes Clarity: Writing about your experiences can provide clarity and insight, helping you to understand your feelings and thoughts more deeply.

Combining mindfulness practices focused on appreciation with the power of journaling creates a holistic approach to recognizing and celebrating the fulfillment of your desires. It nurtures a deep sense of gratitude and contentment, grounding you in the present moment and allowing you to acknowledge the beauty and richness of your life as it is now.

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Lifehack segment:

In today's Lifehack segment, let's delve into the art of tuning into your natural energy rhythms and utilizing this awareness to optimize your daily schedule. This technique is particularly beneficial for moms who are balancing family responsibilities with personal and professional goals. By identifying when you naturally have the highest and lowest energy and aligning your activities accordingly, you can maximize your productivity while maintaining flexibility for the unpredictable elements of parenting.

Discovering Your Energy Peaks and Valleys:

Start by spending a few days paying close attention to your energy levels. Notice the times when you feel most alert and vibrant compared to when you feel lethargic or unfocused. It's important to observe these patterns without judgment; they are natural fluctuations that everyone experiences.

Identifying Energizing and Draining Activities:

While monitoring your energy levels, also take note of which activities energize you and which tend to drain you. Do certain tasks or interactions leave you feeling invigorated? Are there specific parts of your day that consistently seem more challenging or exhausting? Understanding these dynamics can provide invaluable insights into how to structure your day more effectively.

Strategic Scheduling:

With this knowledge in hand, start planning your day around these natural energy rhythms. Schedule demanding or important tasks during your peak energy periods. These are the times when you're most likely to be productive and efficient. On the other hand, save less demanding or routine tasks for your lower energy periods.

Incorporating Flexibility for Family Life:

When you have children, unpredictability is part of the daily routine. While it's helpful to plan your day around your energy levels, also build in flexibility to accommodate the needs of your family. This might mean having a few tasks that can be easily shifted or paused when unexpected situations arise.

Regularly Reassess and Adapt:

Your energy levels and the activities that energize or drain you might change over time. Regularly take a step back to reassess your patterns and adjust your schedule accordingly. Being adaptable is key to effectively managing the dynamic nature of both your energy and family life.

Communicate with Your Family:

Share your insights about your energy patterns with your family. Let them understand when you’re most likely to be productive or when you might need a bit more support. This communication can help them understand the best times for collaborative activities or when you might need some uninterrupted time.

Balance with Self-Care:

Finally, remember that your overall energy levels are also influenced by self-care. Ensure you're getting adequate rest, nutrition, and engaging in activities that rejuvenate you. Taking care of yourself is not just beneficial for you, but also for your family.

By becoming more attuned to your natural energy rhythms and planning your day around these patterns, you can harness your peak times for productivity and navigate your low energy periods more effectively. This approach allows you to be more present and engaged with your family, striking a balance between personal goals and family responsibilities.

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Key point #5: 

In the unpredictable journey of life, we often encounter situations that can be likened to curveballs - unexpected and challenging. These moments can range from an unannounced visit from the in-laws, a sudden emergency like a child in the ER, to significant life changes such as job loss. These instances test our resilience and flexibility, requiring us to adapt quickly and maintain our composure. Let’s explore how we can stay flexible and navigate these curveballs with grace and strength.

Embracing Flexibility in the Face of Life's Curveballs:

Acknowledge Your Feelings: When life throws you a curveball, it's natural to experience a whirlwind of emotions – stress, anxiety, frustration, or even panic. Acknowledge these feelings without judgment. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed; it’s a normal human reaction to unexpected challenges.

Pause and Breathe: Before reacting, take a moment to pause and breathe. Deep, controlled breathing can help calm your mind and body, allowing you to approach the situation with a clearer perspective. This pause can be crucial in preventing knee-jerk reactions that you might regret later.

Assess the Situation Objectively: Try to view the situation as objectively as possible. Ask yourself what needs immediate attention and what can wait. For example, a child’s health emergency is a top priority, while an unexpected visit from in-laws might be managed with some quick adjustments.

Adapt and Prioritize: Once you’ve assessed the situation, adapt your plans and prioritize accordingly. This might mean rescheduling appointments, asking for help, or setting aside less urgent tasks. Remember, it’s okay to adjust your expectations of what you can accomplish under these new circumstances.

Communicate Effectively: Communication is key during unexpected situations. If you're dealing with family matters, keep your family members informed and involved in the decisions. If it’s a work-related issue like a job loss, reach out to your support network for advice and assistance.

Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to lean on your support system. Whether it's family, friends, or a professional, having someone to talk to can provide comfort and practical solutions. Sometimes, just voicing your concerns and challenges can bring clarity and relief.

Embrace a Problem-Solving Mindset: Instead of dwelling on the problem, focus on finding solutions. This shift in mindset from problem-oriented to solution-oriented can empower you to take constructive action and find creative ways to manage the situation.

Practice Self-Care: Amidst the chaos, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Neglecting your well-being can add to the stress and make the situation more challenging to handle. Ensure you’re getting enough rest, eating well, and finding small moments to relax and recharge.

Reflect and Learn: After the situation has been managed, take some time to reflect. What did you learn? How can you be better prepared for similar situations in the future? This reflection can turn a challenging experience into a valuable lesson for personal growth.

Life’s curveballs, while challenging, also present opportunities for growth and learning. Staying flexible isn’t just about making adjustments on the fly; it’s about maintaining a mindset that is open to change, grounded in the present, and focused on finding solutions. Remember, it’s through these unexpected challenges that we often discover our resilience and strength.

As we conclude this segment and move into the coaching questions, let’s carry with us the understanding that flexibility is not just a skill, but a valuable life approach that empowers us to navigate the ebb and flow of life with grace and poise.

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Segment: Coaching Questions

As we near the end of today's episode, rich with insights on mindfulness, resilience in the face of life's surprises, and attuning to our own energy rhythms, it's time to engage in some profound personal reflection. The following coaching questions are crafted to provoke deep thought, helping you to unearth a more profound understanding of yourself, your aspirations, and the paths to achieve them. These questions are designed not just for casual contemplation but to prompt a moment of genuine pause and introspection. Whether you choose to explore them through journaling, meditation, or quiet reflection, allow yourself to fully engage with each one.

1. In what ways might your life be different if you fully embraced the practice of mindfulness? Consider the potential changes in your daily interactions, stress levels, and overall well-being.

2. Reflect on a recent challenging situation. What did it reveal about your strengths and areas for growth in terms of flexibility and resilience?

3. Identify a dream or goal you've put on hold. What fears or beliefs have been preventing you from pursuing it?

4. When you think about the energy-draining aspects of your day, what underlying needs or desires are being neglected? How can you address these to restore balance?

5. Consider a time when you felt completely in tune with your natural energy rhythm. What were you doing, and how can you incorporate more of that into your daily life?

6. Think about the last time you experienced a significant 'curveball' in your life. What coping strategies did you use, and how effective were they? What would you do differently next time?

7. Envision a day where everything aligns perfectly with your energy levels and priorities. What does it look like, and what steps can you take to make this a reality?

8. If you were to make one change in your life that could have a significant positive impact on your well-being, what would it be? Why haven't you made this change yet?

9. Contemplate the role of self-care in your life. Is it a priority or an afterthought? What message does this send to yourself and those around you?

10. Looking at the goals you've set for the next 3 to 6 months, what tangible actions can you take this week to move one step closer to achieving them?

Take the time you need to delve into these questions. They are intended to be more than just queries; they are invitations to embark on a journey of self-discovery and intentional living. Your answers have the power to illuminate your path forward, guiding you towards a life that aligns more closely with your deepest values and aspirations. Remember, each step you take on this journey, no matter how small, is a vital part of your ongoing growth and fulfillment.

CLOSING REMARKS & EPISODE SUMMARY

Episode summary:

As we bring this episode to a close, let's take a moment to reflect on our journey today. We've delved into the transformative power of mindfulness and the importance of aligning our daily lives with our natural energy rhythms. These practices aren't just concepts; they're tools for a more balanced and fulfilled life, especially in the challenging yet rewarding journey of motherhood.

Remember, change is a gradual process. Celebrate your small victories and be patient with yourself as you integrate these new practices. Every day brings new opportunities for growth and learning. Your experiences, challenges, and triumphs, shared within our community, can inspire and support others in their journey.

Looking ahead, our next episode promises to be both enlightening and deeply informative. We'll be exploring the distinction between ADHD and trauma, a topic often shrouded in questions and misconceptions. Joining us will be Tanisha Shedden, an expert in the field, who will provide invaluable insights into how these conditions impact children's behavior and development, helping us navigate these complex issues with greater clarity.

So, tune in next week for what promises to be a highly insightful discussion with Tanisha Shedden. Until then, continue to embrace your journey in motherhood, cherishing the moments with your family and remembering the incredible job you're doing. Goodbye for now, and see you next week for an engaging conversation on ADHD versus trauma.

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Outro: 

Thank you for joining us on this week's refreshing wellness discussion. I'm Autumn Carter, your guide through the seasons of motherhood, and I hope you found inspiration and valuable insights during our time together.

If you resonate with the topics we explored today and want to continue your wellness journey, I invite you to follow me on Instagram at Moms Wellness in Every Season. There, you'll discover a wealth of ongoing wellness tips specifically curated for moms like you.

Sharing our podcast with others is an act of caring, and I invite you to spread the word by sharing, subscribing, and leaving a review wherever you enjoy your podcasts. Your support is deeply valuable to us and enables us to reach more mothers who are seeking transformation and empowerment.

If you have a specific topic you'd like us to cover in more detail or if you're interested in a free coaching consultation, don't hesitate to reach out. You can send me a direct message on Instagram or visit my website, wellnessineveryseason.com, to send an email. I'm here to support you on your wellness journey.

Thank you again for being a part of our vibrant community. I'm genuinely excited to connect with you, hear your stories, and continue this important discussion in the weeks to come.

Until next time, remember to prioritize your well-being, embrace every season with grace, and always strive for wellness in every aspect of your motherhood journey. Take care, and I can't wait to catch up with you soon.

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